Gizza Job

Okay, computer working again (after running the Windows Recovery Console several times), and I'm trying to write something not-too-stupid about me on a far-too-stupid job application form. The job is 'Basic Skills Tutor' in a place that teaches literacy to anyone who can't read english well enough to...fill in job application forms.

My bullshit will look something like this:
I have extensive experience with computers and IT, having worked as a programmer and self employed repair technician. The latter involved teaching customers about wordprocessing, database management, safety and security.

Years spent in higher education have given me the ability to work independantly and unsupervised, writing to deadlines and handling large amounts of information.

I have been unemployed for many months at a time during periods of recession, and have attended several Jobcentre Plus courses. I can therefore appreciate first hand the frustration of the long term unemployed with unhelpfully worded forms, impatient civil servants and a hostile marketplace.

My last paid job involved singlehandedly setting up and running a videotape library and off-air recording service for the University of Portsmouth. Before that, I was manager, curator and co-owner of a small art gallery.

Recent work as actor and sound engineer with a somewhat volatile local theatre company, and years spent helping local bands put together demo CDs for record companies have, I feel, given me an ability to handle conflict within groups.

A year spent as a teaching assistant for children with special needs at Priory School gave me a sense of achievement at having given some ordinary people a better chance.

Something like that anyway.