This week, all my quotes come from fundamentalists posting in Christian discussion forums, as lovingly collected here.
"pi changes depending upon the strength of the gravitational field involved."
- MHGinTN
"Deoxyribonucleic Acid, for example... sounds impressive, right? But have you ever seen what happens if you put something in acid? It dissolves! If we had all this acid in our cells, we'd all dissolve!"
- EnemyPartyII
"Gravity: Doesn't exist. If items of mass had any impact of others, then mountains should have people orbiting them...These objects in space have yet to receive mans touch, and thus have no sin to weigh them down...The more sin, the heavier something is."
- Anonymous
"All any terrorist has to do is drop large quantities of plutonium from airplanes onto American soil and it will render electricity completely useless."
- Carico
"Sorry but scientists have just shown that mice DNA is more similar to humans than human DNA."
- Carico
Now then. You may recall that seven days ago I started a small experiment. I posted some text about a certain notorious short porn video, just to see how many would find my blog by searching for it.
And I can now reveal: There were four hits! Two for "two girls one cup" and one each for "2 girls one cup" and "2 girls and 1 cup".
So, in this informal scientific experiment, four perverts read my blog this week.
Well, four plus the usual pervs, naturally, MJ.
That's quite enough of that. Here's some soothing pictures to take our minds off such pervaciousness.
In any case, the other hits though were less sensational...
gary taubes
blogs on different interpretations of sleeping beauty
asa bhosle
how do you pronounce Brno
accupressureists
Plutius identities
translate nimic into english
bein pensant definition
rhyming with relaxed
WHAT RHYMES WITH RELAX
timeline of weapon inventions
phymod realtime version
"uri geller" liar magician
non smoking rhymes
mp3 "hollywood beyond"
"hollywood beyond" what's the color of money mp3 blog
damon blows america blogspot
amorzinho translation portuguese
"have you heard it on the news"
...so I guess I'm still respectable to some folks.
My morning was taken up explaining to bureaucrats why I'm too busy for them. I'd let myself be persuaded that, if only I stopped acting hostile and appealed to their reason, they might co-operate. So I tried it, with one additional factor - I acted confident.
And it worked too. They don't really know how to deal with people who treat penpushers behind desks as functionaries to be treated with polite firmness, instead of priests blessing supplicants with their favour.
One exchange sticks in my mind, as indicative of how they think:
Bureaucrat: So you've got the job?
Kapitano: Yes.
'Crat: Can you prove it? Do you have documentation?
Kap: You want a written record of a telephone interview.
'Crat: Yes.
Kap: I'll get them to send me a confirmation.
'Crat: That should be okay. But you mustn't leave the building till you get it.
Kap: I don't have time for that. I'll be back later, goodbye.
There's a certain type of computer geek for who the cry, "Mine's smaller than yours! It's tiny!" is a cause of much envy and competition. These are the operating system minimalists - those who try to cut down Windows or Linux to the barest essentials, and then the even barer essentials, in the cause of running speed and efficiency.
There's a series of miniature versions of XP, called TinyXP and culminating in TinyXP Platinum 2, which cut out all the unused (or barely used) and antiquated from XP, leaving a rapid and stable husk of 350MB - about 1/6th the size of the "official" XP - and running with 50MB RAM instead of the 512 that's the usual minimum.
Microsoft is, of course, not amused at this sort of thing. Every time a miniature (or you might say "cleaned up") versions of Windows appears on one of the filesharing systems, they're quick to shut it down. This means it's difficult to find them, but not impossible. I've got TinyXP PE2, plus some earlier versions, and a different hack of XP designed especially for music making.
Of course, what Windows really needs is a redesign from the ground up, which is what Vista was supposed to be but absolutely wasn't. Windows could be recast at one tenth the size and three times the speed, but such a thing would be massive undertaking, far out of the reach of hacker groups, and somehow I doubt that Microsoft will have the decency or good sense to do it, even after the catastrophic failure of Vista.
Anyway, If Linux is your thing, there's several open souce miniature versions, including Damn Small Linux. If, after the next week or so, I have any spare time at all, I might give it a whirl.
So how DO you pronounce Brno?
ReplyDeleteOver at mine, the search of the week is "mistress turns little dick sissies into cocksuckers one at a time." You can't get more specific than that, can you?
So how DO you pronounce Brno?
ReplyDeleteUm. Er. You pronounce it how it's spelt :-D.
Someone did once find me with:
"Mother and me have got hold of some new diet pills. They're called "Equical", and they're such a well-kept secret they're not even on ebay"
...presumably because they think if they paste a sentence from my blog into Google, they'll find lots of blogs like mine. Which is a nice thought.
But I can't match your readers for sheer pervery.