Day 19

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I think it went pretty well.

Several people told me it wasn't a good idea to script half the lesson, or have a plan fifteen pages long, and one said I shouldn't play music in the background....but I did, I did, and I did, and it was the only lesson that I've come away from feeling good about it. Or being congratulated by co-trainees.

So, I'm happy again, and the course is effectively over. There's a load of admin tomorrow, an unobserved and improvised lesson of boardgames and "hangman" in the afternoon, and an equally improvised meal/drink/evening-out for trainees and selected learners. But nothing I'd call work.

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Although I'm not quallified to teach children (or teenagers), and although I have no desire at all to be in a classroom with fifty of them, There's a good chance I'll be doing both at some point.

There's also a distinct possibility that I'll wind up teaching Business English, to people whose mindset and lifestyle I despise.

TEFL is, in most ways, a job like any other. Your collegues can annoy you, your clients can be wastes of carbon, and your superiors can be idiots.

And in some ways it's like being a prostitute. A lot of people drop in and out of it, it doesn't look like hard work but it is, and you charge GBP20 for an hour. Of oral practice and drilling.

But you do get to see the world, have a fair degree of autonomy, and solve a neverending stream of fascinating problems.

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I've been taking the Kalm's after all. Actually I've been taking twice the prescribed dose, or eight pills a day. Did they help me stay calm (or Kalm) and teach confidently today? Or was it spending more hours than I can remember on the plan? Or the music, or just four weeks of practice? I don't know.

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It's nearly 2100, I'm sitting in my lodgings in Hackney, and for the first time in a month there's nothing urgent or stressful that needs doing.

I'm a bit lost.

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