Dumb Contest



And now, Kapitano's Kompetition Korner!



I had four conversations today, each with someone who made one or more deeply fuckwitted claims. One was a student of politics, one a student of history, and the other two longtime socialists.

Your challenge is to match up the claims with who made them. Here are the claims:

(1) Everyone who's rich deserves to be rich. Everyone who's poor deserves to be poor. Unless they're former rich people who lost it all - then they're just unlucky.

(2) There's no such thing as luck. Everyone has the same opportunities in life.

(3) To eradicate homophobia and racism, just wait 50 years - because history always goes from worse to better. It's a cast iron law.

(4) Most teachers think they have a right to sex with their students.

(5) Politicians always try to do what's right, and aren't in it for the money.

(6) It's not wrong for someone to murder you if you're gay in Pakistan, because that's their culture. It's wrong in the UK because it's our culture.

(7) Homosexuality was declassified as a mental disorder at the same time as a conservative government was in power, therefore conservatives don't hate gays.

(8) It's impossible to redistribute wealth because there's always a dictator at the top of the process.

(9) If Rupert Murdoch earns a million times as much as someone else, it's because he works a million times as hard. Literally.


And here are the people:

(A) Politics Student
(B) History Student
(C) Either Socialist


Just match up the letters with the numbers. Answers in 48 hours, and the prize is...um...

...oh I know. I'll do a special audio blogpost, and you decide on the subject! And the background music!

So don't delay, match the stupid person to the stupid comment, and win a not very good prize!

8 comments:

  1. (1)-B
    (2)-B
    (3)-B
    (4)-C
    (5)-A
    (6)-A
    (7)-B
    (8)-C
    (9)-A

    Just a total stab in the dark, really. Which reminds me. If you were going to get a cheap notebook what would you get?

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  2. (A) Politics Student

    (4) Most teachers think they have a right to sex with their students.

    (5) Politicians always try to do what's right, and aren't in it for the money.

    (7) Homosexuality was declassified as a mental disorder at the same time as a conservative government was in power, therefore conservatives don't hate gays.

    (9) If Rupert Murdoch earns a million times as much as someone else, it's because he works a million times as hard. Literally.

    (B) History Student

    (6) It's not wrong for someone to murder you if you're gay in Pakistan, because that's their culture. It's wrong in the UK because it's our culture.

    (3) To eradicate homophobia and racism, just wait 50 years - because history always goes from worse to better. It's a cast iron law.
    (C) Either Socialist

    (1) Everyone who's rich deserves to be rich. Everyone who's poor deserves to be poor. Unless they're former rich people who lost it all - then they're just unlucky.

    (2) There's no such thing as luck. Everyone has the same opportunities in life.

    (8) It's impossible to redistribute wealth because there's always a dictator at the top of the process.


    There!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I can't participate in this contest because I'm suffering from a rip in my time/reality continuum.

    WTF?

    These came from students and socialists?

    I take it they were really 6 years old, which has got to be their only excuse. I'd have to put my Boy down if he ever repeated such drivel. I'd look upon it as my civic responsibility. I'd then have to commit suicide for failing so utterly as a mother.

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  4. @Roses:

    Ha! That's an actual laugh out loud.

    These came from students and socialists?

    I take it they were really 6 years old, which has got to be their only excuse.


    The students were in their late teens, though I should say those who were both students and socialists were much smarter.

    The barman appeared half an hour later and said they'd had a complaint about us discussing politics. I reminded him he was lying, so he switched to another lie - that the pub had a rule: No political discussions. I told him he was full of crap and he tried to stare me down.

    A pity really. He was quite cute.

    I'd have to put my Boy down if he ever repeated such drivel. I'd look upon it as my civic responsibility. I'd then have to commit suicide for failing so utterly as a mother.

    Oh no no. We can't have good mothers killing themselves. There's so few of them as it is.

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  5. @Camy: If you were going to get a cheap notebook what would you get?

    Cheap notebooks. Hmmm....

    (1) Don't buy second hand. They're slow and it's nearly impossible to get the parts to repair them.

    (2) Don't use a high street vendor like Dixon's or Currys. They're expensive, the range is small, and they all charge you extra money for having an operating system you don't need and don't like preinstalled.

    (2.1) Dell are pretty good, though more expensive.

    3) If you want small size at the expense of speed, EeePCs are pretty good now. But remember that small keyboards need small nimble fingers.

    3.1) You can get really small PCs that don't have a disc drive - they use USB sticks instead. Good if you can make bootable sticks, but not easy to find.

    4) Mac laptops are probably much more powerful (and expensive) than you need. IMO their operation is also inflexible.

    5) Samsung and to so extent Nokia tend to use non-standard ports - in their computers as well as their phones. Just something to check.

    ...so I don't have a specific recommendation. Just a list of 'avoid's.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh, i like competitions! I'm rubbish at them, as you'll soon realise, but i still like them.

    A - Politics student
    Statements 1, 2, & 9. On the basis that, back in my day, politics students always tried to shock their lecturers by pretending to be anarchists, and the modern day equivalent is quite possibly pretending to be a libertarian.

    B - History student
    Statements 4, 5 & 7. On the basis that i've pretty much used this as a place to dump the statements that don't seem to fit in the other categories.

    C - Either Socialist
    Statements 3, 6 & 8. On the basis that: (3) a belief in a slow march to an inevitable golden future is quite socialist; (6) quite a lot of socialists have slipped into cultural relativism; (8) an anti-authoritarian socialist keen to demonstrate how opposed s/he is to communism might say something like that (as might a libertarian politics student...).

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  7. I’m with Roses on this. WTF?

    Everyone who's rich deserves to be rich. Everyone who's poor deserves to be poor.

    And how exactly is what we deserve determined? If someone would have explained the rules before I racked up so much bad karma in a previous existence, I could be rich now.

    There's no such thing as luck. Everyone has the same opportunities in life.

    Yeah, all those people in Haiti are having such a hard time because they’re just too lazy to take advantage of all their opportunities.

    To eradicate homophobia and racism, just wait 50 years - because history always goes from worse to better.

    What alternate timeline is this twit studying?

    Most teachers think they have a right to sex with their students.

    No, most teachers think they have the right be to paid more than subsistences wages.

    Politicians always try to do what's right, and aren't in it for the money.

    Of course. That’s why none of them are ever accused of wrong doing.

    It's not wrong for someone to murder you if you're gay in Pakistan, because that's their culture. It's wrong in the UK because it's our culture.

    Situational ethics at its best.

    conservatives don't hate gays.

    And they simply love women and minorities.

    The one good thing about reading stupid comments from stupid people is that I now feel incredibly intellegent and level-headed.

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  8. @Household Goddess:

    Everyone who's rich deserves to be rich. Everyone who's poor deserves to be poor.

    And how exactly is what we deserve determined?


    I did ask that. Apparently it's because rich people sacrifice a lot to get rich.

    I think mostly they sacrifice other people.

    To eradicate homophobia and racism, just wait 50 years - because history always goes from worse to better.

    What alternate timeline is this twit studying?


    Possibly the timeline of "desperate self deception". You can't bring someone to reality if they're too arrogant or too scared to discard the delusions which they developed to keep them happy but haven't gone away.

    Politicians always try to do what's right, and aren't in it for the money.

    Of course. That’s why none of them are ever accused of wrong doing.


    Some of them go on the Glenn Beck show and talk about naked wrestling in the shower and groping interns...as though that's what every heterosexual senator does in high spirits.

    But Glenn Beck doesn't invite them back.

    It's not wrong for someone to murder you if you're gay in Pakistan, because that's their culture. It's wrong in the UK because it's our culture.

    Situational ethics at its best.


    Well, real situational ethics is a lot better than that. This is just total moral relativism - of the kind some young people go through a brief phase of when they first discover the old certainties aren't certain.

    I think it's only possible to be a complete relativist if you're never faced with real life moral dilemmas. If you're kept protected by...rich parents?

    conservatives don't hate gays.

    And they simply love women and minorities.


    John Tyndall was the leader of the British nazi party in the 70s, and everyone knew he was gay. Everyone in the party knew he liked to touch up young aryan men. But it was never an issue among the gayhating nazis...until there was an internal power struggle.

    Then suddenly it really mattered. Nazis being hypocrits? How unexpected!

    If there were any black teabagger's I reckon we'd see the same thing in their movement.

    The one good thing about reading stupid comments from stupid people is that I now feel incredibly intellegent and level-headed.

    Yes! That's why I hang out with stupid people.

    Either that or there's just no one else to hang out with in this town.

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