Back to Shite, Back to Reality

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Nothing very interesting happened this week.

Well not to me anyway - I've spent the last six days failing to turn a series of obsolete laptops into portable recording studios.

You know how it is - you use every trick you've picked up or invented, you throw all your intelligence and all your time at a problem, and finally conclude that some problems can't be solved with tricks, intelligence and late nights. These are the problems you solve with money, as in "you spend your money on a new laptop and throw the old one away".

If I had some money I might do that.

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Oh, and I've had a stinking cold too.

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The UK has continued its slide into the abyss in my absence.

The police have taken to raiding curryhouses and Chinese resteraunts (plus the homes of their owners) at odd hours, "looking for illegal migrant workers". Perhaps if they raided expensive hotels, farms and any business that has a cleaning staff they might find some. I can't think why that hasn't occurred to them.

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Back in Bulgaria, none of the English speakers I spoke with wanted to live in the UK. They used to - they'd learned English to find a new life, either in the UK (because of its nice culture) or the USA (because of its vibrant economy). But not now. The economies are sinking into the toilet, and the cultures are way past the U-bend.

Everyone knows now what revolting people the Brits have turned into, and the former students of English now want German or Spanish. Which is ironic really, because Germany and Spain are even more racist than us.

There were still a few reasons to favour the UK, one of which was its food - cheap, plentiful and even reasonably cosmpolitan. But now that's gone. Courtesy, we are told, of simultaneous worldwide shortages of rice and wheat, caused by newly pesticide resistant insects.

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So, my plans are unchanged, but a little more urgent: Find a TEFL job somewhere exotic and stay there for a year. Finding a job takes a week; Filling out the paperwork to go there takes a month.

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